Homespun Truth

Well, it's a new day and exactly as I predicted yesterday, not nearly as dark.

I'm finding a path slowly.

It's simple really. God blessed me with really difficult kids. Foster kids are hard, but I was asked to do this. Autism stinks, but these are my boys.

All for a reason.

All for a reason.

And so, I'm taking a deep breath and taking the next step.

In the last few days I've spent a lot of time just being quiet and praying and resting.

As always, God spoke. The answer is this. Give them enough grace and mercy and love. Be patient and kind. Wait on My time and they will indeed come around.

So I will continue on my quest to be a quiet, calm mom. I will try to see beyond what everyone else is doing and where my little gaggle of kids doesn't quite measure up. I will try instead to see the places where they've grown and been gifted. I will try to believe that big hearts will count. I will try not to hear the comments in the places we go. I will try not to see the stares and glares.

For the sake of the kids I will try to be bigger than all the garbage around them. I will try again, not to be a part of the junk, but a part of something that is good in their lives.

I will try to remember that our path was meant for us and no one else. I will try to remember that we really don't belong on someone elses path.

***********Update***********

God blessed me in the parking lot of the grocery store this afternoon.

I was weary of shopping and people and my Littlest Mr. after an hour at the cheap mart trying to decide what to buy for the sibs for their birthday.

Getting out and walking in was a slow and steady whine. Mommy, can we get some munchies? Please??

I gave the standard mommy responses, not on the list, do you really think it's ok, let's try to find something your brother and sister like too.

An older lady was following us. She caught up and talked to me.

She said:

"you're a really good mom"
"I just want to thank you for doing such a good job"
"no one ever thanks the moms, so I want to thank you"

I'm not kidding.

And she was real.

I know because she was there in the aisles as we went through the store filling our cart. She keep appearing and repeating her lines.

"you're a good mom, thank you for doing it"

So, I just thought I'd let you know. God was at Pick-N-Save this afternoon. She had gray hair and a pink sweatshirt and a sense of humor when my little boy gave her his most irreverent "whatever".