It's All About God

It is hard to walk along side my Missy Sissy as her family struggles through this thing called cancer. It is painful to see a sweet child like Andrew suffer.

To walk this path is to see us for what we are. We are failed and flawed. For all our greatness, we are still nothing compared to Him. Our God is all greatness.

Even when we are lost in the storm of uncertainty, He is certain. His plans will not always be to our liking, but they will be for good.

Every little while in my life, I've felt like I've come through some big stuff and now could walk a little more steady. I had those big experiences behind me, gained the perspectives, learned some of the lessons and could walk forward into the next part of life with a certain confidence and hope.

Then around the next corner in the path is a bump or a hole so large it disarms me. The new thing looms before me and intimidates. It makes me think for just a split second what it would look like to try to live this one out off the path. That temptation always comes and goes in just a heart beat, but still, I'm human.

My faith is just as frail as the next persons. I have big questions for this big God of mine. I don't always rest easy in the silence that often answers my whining.

I do come back around, simply because there is no other choice for me. I Believe. It's that simple. I Believe. And because I believe, I know that I am not looking at this huge thing all alone.

So even when I look ahead at some giant obstacle or challenge and can't see any outcome and fear most of the possible outcomes I can think of, I can turn over my worry and fear to the Lord. He doesn't want me to be spending my energy worrying about some plan that He has made and I don't understand, He wants me to be about the business of love.

So as I keep on trying to see down the path that Andrew is on, as I keep on trying to figure out what is going to happen next, how is it all going to turn out, I realize I can't know. I find myself thinking over and over, I just don't know how to do this.

But, God does exactly what He promises. He provides me with whatever I need to have to do whatever it is needs to be done.

As a simple side note, oh how I wish I could write a single thought without total chaos in my home. With posts it is a now or never sort of thing. I have to grab whatever moment presents itself and try to focus it all together around all the disruptions. Sometimes these come out clear and sometimes they are just a jumble.

Either way, it's what I've got to work with, so here it was.