I Spy

I just have to paint you this picture of my morning errand trip.

Now, I know that I'm not a picture of fashion or a chick with a body that stops anything, but I know my limits. It's also the season. You know, the season here in the mid-west where warm weather comes and we leave the hibernation of our homes but we're still chubby. Anyway.

There were a few "sights" along the way today that made me pause.

Now, I for one, firmly believe that we could do ourselves and each other a favor by taking a few steps back in fashion or perhaps having some restraint or something. Or maybe just restrictions, like it's perfectly fine to wear spandex type shorts while you're participating in whatever the designated athletic activity is. Then perhaps we need to make some clarifications about what exactly is an athletic activity.

I'm pretty sure shopping doesn't count.

Maybe we could put a limit on those cami-tank style shirts? Or maybe just have age and size regulations when it comes to who should or should not be wearing certain undergarments. Maybe just err on the side of caution and put it anyway before heading out.

Now, I know that I left the house this morning looking like less than a positive fashion statement. I had on my ratty tennies because those store floors hurt my knees if I wear the cute flip flops and because I had two little helpers and the odds of my toes getting squashed by a full shopping cart were high. I started out with clean Capri's and a clean shirt, but after 2 stores, 1 toddler, 1 preschooler and free samples, I didn't come home as clean.

I fully admit walking into a Walmart with a great big old orange Cheetoe hand print on my back. Thanks kid.

But here's the thing, at no point in my life, have I ever thought, yeah, bikini top and spandex shorts with all my rolls would be a great way to go to the mall. Um, yeah, no! Help us out here, at least throw on a huge t-shirt over the thing.

I know, it's my yearly, there oughta be a rule gripe. Let's have an age limit on bikini's. Let's have a weight limit too. Let's have a modesty check for those one piecers too. Just saying.

What brought me around to this today? Well, let me paint the picture of what I saw sitting in the driver seat of my bus in the Walmart parking lot today.

Now, I know it's a little red neck-y where I live. And I know that it was a Walmart parking lot. I know it's summer. I know I drive a bus. I got all that.

The kids are buckled in with snacks. I turn on the air and check my messages before we head out. I look out the window and see this.

A late 20's woman with a nice 80's bleached out hair do, walking back and forth in the parking spot next to her car. She's talking on her cell and smoking. She's wearing ripped Capri's and hooker heels. On the other side of her Caviler is a well worn Trans Am with a 50 something couple pulling the hood up to put fluids in. Then boy friend drives up in his rusted out Toyota pick up. He leaves it running, shaking actually, and hops out to talk to his woman. He's wearing a wife beater and has that long straggly hair.

It was just one of those moments.

Now, don't mistake it, I love living here, sights and all. I just thought maybe a little afternoon eye spy was in order!