It's a Monday. I'm going to use that as my excuse for my slightly snappish ramble. That and it's an after all that fun, we're crashing kind of weekend.
So Friday and Saturday we had a great time. Well, mostly all summer long we've been having a great time. In fact we've been running at a whole new pace this summer.
A new pace in a good way. See, I'm laid back by nature, or as The Mr. would say, you're the other have of "a body in motion remains in motion". I'm the body at rest. You know, the one that stays at rest. Ahem. Yeah, well anyway. That's me. I like to just be hanging around and not really doing much. I like being at home. I like sitting around and reading books and puttering with all my at home projects and doing all my chores at a snails pace.
But here's the thing, small kids, even middle size kids aren't so great with a whole entire summer of just hanging around and doing, well, nothing. After a while, they get cranky and bored. They get on each others nerves and mine. They start to bicker with all the other kids on the block.
And that's the part that puts me over the edge. All school year we can hardly wait for the opportunities to come along to have a little play time with the neighbor kids. By the end of June, though, it's like the count down to the massacre.
Last year, I realized the cure was just simply to not be hanging around here so much.
This year, I may have gone overboard a bit. At least in the realm of what we're used to. I planned a lot. I made sure we had the all important pool pass. I set up time with grandparents. There are summer camps and picnics and zoo trips. I choose to say yes to most of the play time offers, even when my heart longs to say no. I'm pushing them and more importantly me, out the door and into activity.
The thing is, every few weeks we need a day or two at home in the air conditioning being slugs in front of the screens. It lets everyone rest and cool down. Lots of munching and hydrating. A few almost naps happen, you know, that dozing off in front of a movie or under a book in the sunshine. It gives a moment or two to catch up on laundry and dishes and floors and bathrooms. You know, because in reality you can only go in and out the back door dumping bags of stuff and repacking the pool bags and heading back out the door before the back hall explodes!
I had a mini mom tantrum today when our dental appointments got all messed up. Not any ones fault I suspect. I think it was probably a true misunderstanding. In the end I'm sure it'll all work out, it was just frustrating to get there a little early for our appointment, as requested, find the office closed up because of lunch hour and then be told there is no appointment. They claim they called here and who ever they spoke with cancelled the appointment. I'm betting not, but by then I had two crying, sweaty kids and our appointment slot had be filled by someone else anyway.
The worst part of the tantrum was that I called The Mr. while he was waiting to board his plane and yelled at him. Not that he did it or had anything to do with it or could fix it, he just happens to be The Mr. He's in Vegas. Business.
Honestly. I'm a little bummed to be here with all the Littles instead of in Vegas with The Mr. I'm quite sure I could have found something to do while he was working. Sort of like the trip to Denver he'll be taking over my birthday in the fall, sure would be sweet to tag along, but with it being the start of 3 kids school years, I'm pretty sure I'll be enjoying the fall right here at home.
A week or so ago there was a conversation about a song and what it meant and if it was somehow doing something wrong in the spirit of Christianity. Like was it giving an inaccurate picture of God or was it not perfectly Biblically accurate. It's been hanging with me, but I think I at least have my ideas. I think it has a lot to do with the gap that comes with poetry. Songs are poetry, lyrics. Parts of the Bible are actual songs, lyrics and poetry. Other parts are not. The rub comes in putting a set of feelings or emotional experiences tied to a non-poetical section of the Bible into a song and then not personally choosing your audience. Should a person who is not of a poetical bent listen to one of those songs/poems it simply seems wrong. It seems as though there is a tremendous misinterpretation of information or a total misconception presented.
I can't make poetry work for someone else. I can't even make all poetry work for myself. I can tell you though, that even when I write a poem that is particularly clear and concise, almost no one interprets it or hears it the way I meant it.
This one just gets under my skin and I really couldn't place it until this morning. On the Christian radio station, yes, I know, right there is the first issue, they spend a lot of time talking about making a difference. Now, I'm right there with that. I love to see people doing things that make a difference. And I love to meet people who have something that they're working hard at making a difference for even if it seems small or unusual. A small thing being done, even by a single person, makes a difference.
And here's where my judgemental human failings take over.
I just don't buy that whole thing that buying the triple mocha latte skinny froth for the person behind you is serving Jesus.
Now, don't misunderstand. It's great to share. It's great to be nice. It's great to surprise a total stranger with a little kindness.
But I think there is more to being the hands and feet of Jesus than buying a random stranger a coffee on a Monday morning. There is more than tossing change into the toll booth for the car behind you.
I'm pretty sure the Jesus I know doesn't want my loose change. He doesn't want my random gesture to a stranger.
He wants my all. He wants my investment.
Maybe that cup of coffee is worth something if you struck up a conversation and over the next year built a relationship of love, well, now, maybe that would be something.
Maybe if the spending the money is what works for you, you could be the person who provides the coffee at the homeless shelter for the month.
Maybe when we realize everything is HIS and what He wants is for us to love Him with everything we have and everything we are and then in turn love His people, our friends and enemies, well, then we might be getting started.
I'd love to hear what's rattling around in your mind these days, drop a line in the comments.