Friday, May 27, 2011


So today's prompt over at NaBloPoMo is the last song you listened to

Funny how life lines itself up.

The last song I listened to today was Daughters by John Mayer.  The link takes you to the lyrics, you can hear it easily enough on YouTube.

It's a little bit melancholy and a little bit hard won advice.  I find it's a song that's been a refrain through my days and nights these past few years.

For the last 4 1/2 years I have been mother to someone else's daughter.  Just last night, she stood before me in all her budding almost 5 year old glory and asked when she could call her other mama. 

The mother daughter dance is complex.  Never easy.

My own mama called me last night to check in on which one of my babies broke his head and see if things, if I, was OK. 

I was, and I am, and a stolen moment in chaos to exchange few words and nothing deep or dramatic, were comfort and kindness.

A mother daughter dance evolves and ebbs and flows.

Another mother's daughter has been living with me.  She shares our space and our lives.

I am not her mother.  I don't play that role.  I don't pretend to.  I could not.

I am both friend and enemy.  I am wise and green stick useless.  I am a push and a pull, encouragement and accountability. 

I walk the middle ground as best I'm able, which isn't very well.

I am mother by birth, by adoption.  An almost mother by foster care. 

I am a sounding block, a shoulder, an ear.  A knee bent on your behalf, a prayer whispered.

"Fathers, be good to your daughters

Daughters will love like you do

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers, be good to your daughters too"

It's a lyric of a legacy. 

The mother daughter legacy.

So there you have it.  A Friday look into the sound track of my life.