I am. Really.
I'm just tired and cranky. This stupid foot of mine is taking over. As much as I want to be ignoring it and getting on with life, it's making me slow. It's making everything take so much more effort and planning. I don't have great patience for this.
I'm just shuffling along in a bit of a fog. It's that state where you try to rationalize which things you can let slide for a few days only to realize that now you have a bigger issue. I really should have just kept plugging along slow and stead in stead of sitting it all out for a few days. Now I have a bit more of a scramble to work with than I'm probably really ready for. Oh well.
It's the life of a mom really. You just keep on going. You walk the path before you and take the next steps even if they're on limpy legs.
As for general updates, we went to court yesterday for Little Miss. It's sort of what I predicted. Not really much new and it sucked up a few hours of my day. There are some new people assigned to the case. There is a potential appeal pending.
Here's how that works.
We're not actually certain at this time if it's her birth family filing the appeal or if it's just the public defenders office making sure there are no errors in this case that could potentially come back and later disrupt an adoption.
So here's what happens. By July 8th a new public defender will be assigned to this case. They will review the case very carefully to see if there is anything that can be written up as an appeal. If there isn't, then we get to move on toward filing for an adoption. If there is, the appeal is written and then sent to Madison for review. From there it will be reviewed. It will either be found as no grounds for appeal and the decision of the judge will stand and we can then proceed to filing for adoption. If it is found that there is grounds for appeal, then we basically go back to the beginning and do another trial. Then it will again be up to a judge or jury to determine if there should be a termination of parental rights.
It seems as though this will be the story of our lives for the next few years. This process for Little Miss could last at least another year. And then there is Little One. We expect his case to turn in this direction in the next 6-9 months. Then we'll begin this process all over again with him. Then there is the question of his siblings.
See, Little One has two older sisters. At this time, they are with another foster family, but that doesn't seem like it will be a permanent home for them. Everyone would like to see the sibling group stay together. The worst would be for them all to be separated or one to be left in the system without a forever home.
It's a mess. There are so many parts of this right now that I'm just refusing to take in and try to process. It's too hard on the heart. And I know it's far to early in the case to even begin spending my energy here. The time will come.
If it crosses your mind, say a little prayer for these two little girls, Missy & Miss-D. I'm going to keep on saying it. These kids don't deserve what they get, and they don't get what they deserve.